Hellion, this is something that I've worried about. Years ago, I was accused of being 'manipulative' by a relative. I've thought and thought about it since and have tried very hard to understand my own motives.
In this particular case, it was he who was manipulating me...putting me in the middle of he and his wifes fights, pushing chores on me to help him...gardening, sewing, babysitting, looking for property for HIM. When I told him to STOP asking me to lie to his wife, he accused me of being 'manipulative'.....just another blockhead member of my family.

So there is nothing wrong with you trying to be sure you are not manipulating people around you, it's part of your self examination, and that's a good thing.