TRIGGERY

I cut tonight. Things just got too intense and I knew I needed to calm down before I OD'd again. So instead of waiting for me to get too bad, I stopped it then and there by cutting. That always does the trick.

The feeling of that cold steel on my skin was amazing! It felt so beautiful and so right! I could do it forever and ever and love every minute of it!

I don't want anyone to say how sorry they are that I cut again after a 5 month absense from it and I don't want pity. Actually, I would be offended because I see it as the most beautiful thing in the world and I never intended to quit. I'm not the type to feel guilt, shame, or have negative emotions about my cutting. It's one of the very few things I am completely proud of.

I just wish I could cut and have it feel this great when I'm not overly upset.