Quote:
Originally Posted by unhappyguy
actually, the T said there was no cure for the childhood neglect / lack of nuturing I received as a child. it's one of the reasons why I do not desire intimacy or seem to enjoy it much. it all reflects back to my rejection and the unending emotional coldness by my mother. intimacy reminds me of that hurt and the hurt undermines intimacy because my basic childhood needs of love, affection and closeness were never met. so, intimacy just makes me . . . sad. it was something that I was never taught. instead, i learned isolation and coldness. being gay just complicates things.
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It's true that that time is gone and you can't go back and live it a different way. Neither can I. But you have an understanding of
why you have problems with intimacy today - I believe that can be worked through and you can learn to develop and accept intimacy
now.
I'm more than a dozen years older than you are, and I'm doing it! Hard work - intimacy feels suffocating - but it's do-able. Please don't give up! You already have insight, and that's a big step. Maybe you should search around and "interview" some other T's.