I don't think any closeness or letting in happens until we're ready for it. No one can force closeness onto you. And this closeness, if it happens, has a purpose in therapy. If you ever decide to get closer to your T, it will probably be a gradual process and you'll go at your own pace. We are in control of who we let in - or not. So try not to worry and just take it all one step at a time.