Monday I signed up for CBT group 4 times a week in the evening. I won't know for 2 weeks or so. Knuckle down time I guess. That was my alternative to the hospital--didn't realize there would be such a long waiting. Told the nurse to look into ECT while I wait, 2 weeks sound awfully long. I've gotten to the end of what I can take.So to take a page from the AA book its just minute by minute.  
((((sewerrats))))) shock therapy is fine for the professional in person but on PC you cannot know whats going on who you are dealing with. SU is much harder than people assume. I've taken care of a kid who tried, he was in a nursing home for life-at 18. People have tried with guns and survived but not with a quality of life. You may have thought it was the right thing to do, by that approach or the others who did the teasing Nam's brought up. But over a PC it just isn't the right way. Don't beat yourself up over it just don't use that way again. If in doubt, ignore or ask or a mediator. 
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Nammu
…Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …...
Desiderata Max Ehrmann
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