If you're the 1st born or 1st daughter, then as a parent, I'd say, the answer seems quite obvious. They didn't really know what they were doing, and thought you needed to be protected and sheltered from the ugliness of the world, buuut, took it too far. That's my theory anyway. Most parents won't admit to having made an error in judgement where their kids are concerned. It's a matter of pride. You say they don't help you understand, now while I know that makes things harder for you in certain areas, try not to judge TOO harshly, I say this bcoz 1, you don't have their POV, so you admittidly don't know what they think or feel. 2, you don't have kids, so empathizing is impossible, and 3, you're not married, so you don't understand your mom's position as a spouse. You also mentioned that your dad screams and swears alot. Do you ask him these questions when he's on a tirade or do you wait for when he's calm? If you haven't tried the calm sensible approach, please do, if you have, well then all you can do is ask them to realize you're an adult, and any mistakes you make, are your own to fix. They're not accountable for you, you are, and you're ready to live your life without their microscope... Also, please don't get into arguments aka shouting matches with them or compare yourself to either of them. Parents D0N'T take you seriously when you do that. All they see is a little girl throwing a tantrum and so CANNOT see you as an adult that is genuinly upset at those times. Ps, not saying you do the above, just have experience with overbearing daddies. Yip, 2, my dad and eldest brother who was old enough to be my dad