Ps. Upon reading the thread (after I posted), sorry... I realized maybe you`re not as arrogant as I figured. But if you have self-esteem issues I`d recommend couseling, and working on ignoring folks at work who make blond jokes. Focus also on inner beauty since you have the outer beauty covered. Life shouldn`t only be about materialism and perfection. At the end of the day, genuine connections with people and authentic and healthy relationships are also very important too. Taking care of one`s looks is super important but not for obsession sake. Looking good is a part of maintaining one`s health and well being. Having the perfect shade of blond and perfect unchipped nail polish is not essential to your health. Emotional health and having good relationships is more important to your health and well being. So I hope you`ll take that into consideration. Also join activities that interest you, that is where to meet people. Maybe take a continuing education class at a college, or learn a new language. These things will help you meet people. One more thing, maybe give the dark eye make up a rest sometime and wear a sheer metalic eye shadow and wear a pink lip gloss the same shape as your lips that`s what I do. I use to be a heavy make up wearing girl but not anymore. The make up started feeling like a mask after a many years. Anyway good luck I hope you will find the right balance in life.