This might be a total guess on my part, and if i am completely wrong, feel free to tell me so. Often times when we are insecure about something, we make it our main feature, for instance, I have a friend who has extremely larger curly hair and he got made fun of a lot for it when he was younger, so now he embraces it as a big part of his personality. Perhaps the thing you should be looking at isn't why people aren't attracted to you, but why you are trying so hard to be found attractive? I'm sure you look great, and there is nothing wrong with wanting to spend time on yourself to make it that way, but there is a fine line between "I have high self esteem and confidence" and "I act like I have high self esteem and confidence, but not really because I feel naked without all the things that 'make' me have high self esteem and confidence". its food for thought. like I said, could be completely wrong. i do think it is valid to look into who you are trying to attract however, because if the people you are trying to attract are intimidated by how perfectionist your look is, than they probably won't approach you. again, all simply food for thought.