What you feel, you feel, so it is always real. The thoughts that erupt from the feelings, however, are not always rational or helpful (I hated some of the CBT emphasis on irrational thoughts, so I sometimes use "unhelpful" instead.) When I feel afraid to share my thoughts and feeling with someone, that does not mean it is unsafe to, I can evaluate whether or not I want to based on whether or not they warrant that trust. I find when I acknowledge what I am feeling and then make a decision from evaluations, the emotions dissipate quickly enough.
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It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: "And this, too, shall pass away." How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction!
---"Address before the Wisconsin State Agricultural Society". Abraham Lincoln Online. Milwaukee, Wisconsin. September 30, 1859.
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