wow hankster you have some really great insight-thank you so much for sharing it with us♥ we guess we can say in her defense,because we have only seen her less than 8 times,that shes really mostly clueless about our system and how we work,who is part of it,because we only see her once every 2 weeks. she keeps asking our permission to contact ex-counselor that we were with for 7+ years strictly for historical info but we havent given it-yet. she keeps encouraging us to allow the grieving process but truth be told we really just dont know how,and we told her as much. she said that anger is much easier because it keeps the pain hidden. but she also frustrates us because she keeps insisting that we have so much more strength and need to "use our system". yeah,right! we feel bad for asking for extra time because she does see us for free and also because she thinks going 2 weeks in between sessions is "good for us" but truly we cant figure out how!