|
Well, I've said/typed if before on here....My dad has PTSD, battles severe depression, and I believe he is also bipolar. I say believe because me and him never had a talk about what his mentall illnesses are but he exhibits every single symptom. His brother, I don't know what was wrong with him. He was that one uncle in the family that was a little, "weird" (i hate to say it like that), withdrawn, quiet, to himself, wouldn't go outside. In fact, up until he died, my dad and my step mom did everything for him because he didn't want to or couldn't leave the house. It was never discussed specifically what was wrong with him, but the older I got, the more I realized something wasn't right. It was always kinda swept under the rug. Although people acknowledged that he had a mental illness, it was never put out there like that...I'm not really familiar with the rest of my dad's side of the family. But I know for a fact, bipolar and mental illnesses run in my family, more specifically my dad's side. I remember awhile back my dad said something that really shocked me. When I was young, his mother told him that I was bipolar. I believe there was also something going on with her mentally, but again, it was never really discussed.
As Anika said, my dad has always been very abusive. He will literally go in a trance and just go off on everything and everything around. He was very violent. Very abusive towards my mother and my siblings. It was scary. I would literally pee on myself when he went off because I was terrified. I feel bad for him because I know what he's going through because I go through the same thing. But at the same time, I feel resentment for so much that has happened.
Reading people's comments about growing up with parents who are bipolar really hurts me as a parent because I hope my daughter doesn't say the same when she grows up. My sister and mother live in another state. My sister has kids about my daughter's age and she is pretty well off financially and a good mother. If it weren't for my daughter's father, I would probably send her off to live with my sister because I'm so scared of damaging her mentally and emotionally. Her father won't let me. Sometimes I feel trapped. I want to do what's in her best interest but he won't hear it. ***sighs*** My life...
__________________
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, & Wisdom to know the difference.
To live is to suffer, and to survive is to find meaning in that suffering
|