1tash1,

I am totally confused. Are these last 4 posts aimed at anyone in particular, or are they thoughts that popped up in your head. And then after posting, another point that you wanted to make popped up, etc.?

The most understandable post, to me anyway, was the last one about your daughters. You have 3 daughters ~ and the oldest made some dumb decisions for herself which disappointed you. Right? Sadly, that experience isn't uncommon. There are a lot of happy, decent families out there where one of the kids experimented a bit too much and changed their lives significantly. It's sad to see that happen ~ it really is. Personally, I would always keep myself open to re-developing a relationship with that daughter, but there would have to be rules agreed upon upfront. If she were to break the rules, she would have to leave.

Maybe you should re-think how you're raising "spoiled bad" girls. In my experience, I had to work for everything I got. Had to buy my food, clothes, car, insurance, college education, etc. It did make me appreciate those things a lot more than others who just got what they wanted, whenever they wanted it. I tried hard, got a high GPA and worked hard to keep it up throughout college. I'm NOT saying that my parents did a great job, believe me, but I do believe that having me paying for my own car and education saved them a lot of heartache.

I waited until I was a little older to go onto college ~ I think I was 25 y.o. I got grants and a p/t job to help me through my junior year. I took my first and only loan in my last year of college, and spent all of my time focusing to keep my GPA up ~ and give myself more options when going for my master's degree. That's my experience.