my friends a married couple that I have known since 1979 say I do that to them, that I have done that several times, then all of a sudden I turn up again. I was in a writers group one time where the new leaders started asking for a "commitment" from the members. I was showing up every week for years before that, but once they started asking, it started bugging me. groups should just be drop in as you please, I thought. if you want a commitment from somebody, freakin get married.