TTUAH,

The other important thing I would like to add, what I really needed in my own recovery work, is to have a constant presence through my struggle that just kept saying it is ok, be patient, it is ok. YOU cannot fix your partner, your partner needs to do this themselves. BUT, you can be such a big help by listening and listening, even though your partner may seem to be repeating themselves and their struggle MANY TIMES. No matter what, keep listening and be soothing and understanding and always reward them when they talk and even say, yes I see it you are right. They really need that as every tiny peice of seeing something a little different can cause them to want to repeat how they are struggling all over again and that need to just add that little extra piece and it can be a very small peice too. That is what the brain is doing, it is surfing and searching and trying to come up with answers. And it is very emotional and time consuming.

Oh, and be prepared for snapping and temper tantrums. That has to come out, and they may seem mad at you as well. Don't respond with anger, the anger just needs to come out, it is has often long been surpressed. There is a lot to being supportive, but you can really help.

And NEVER use any wordage that says anything like "JUST" let it pass, get over, deal, let it go, calm down, relax, nothing that says JUST as that cannot be done while in the throughs of PTSD. It is all HARD WORK.

Open Eyes