View Single Post
 
Old May 22, 2012, 01:36 PM
SmokeyPoole2012's Avatar
SmokeyPoole2012 SmokeyPoole2012 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Mar 2012
Location: Berkshire County MA.
Posts: 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by _frogslegs_ View Post
hi again - i feel like ive been run over today

im still not sure i dont have BP - like smokey said above, there is a chance that i havent recognised my manic episodes as such, ive only really just started to consider my up times might be manic

interestingly, i found some letters the other day that i had written to my mum throughout my life - in a lot of them i sounds completely manic - they were a little uncomfortable to read - im going to take some of them with me to my appointment next week

today im just going to try and get through the day though - im exhausted after yesterday
Before I first found out that I was actually suffering from bp I went to the doctor to be treated for depression. Before that I talked with a councilor from my church. I was properly diagnosed during a 10 day stay at a mental health institution because I attempted suicide. Apparently they observed some manic behavior while under observation unfortunately I was unwilling to except the diagnosis and didn't seek treatment for another 9 years. During those 9 years I spent time becoming more aware of myself analyzing my actions, being more conscious of how I interacted with other people and paying more attention to how other viewed me.

I'm still learning about myself to this day. A few months ago I tried getting my GED because a work related injury left me unable to continue working in the construction industry. Well now I'm aware of the fact I have a learning disability that is making that task almost impossible to achieve.

The reason why I mention all of this is because experience has taught me that if I didn't take my health into my own hands I will be at the mercy of another's 1 hour evaluation. If they get it wrong like they have in the past who knows how long it is going to be before that error is discovered let alone how long of a destructive life style I am going to lead.

Your best chance is to try getting to know yourself.