Hi, I'm 22 years old so I'm not a teen anymore, but I am constantly feeling overwhelmingly bored. I work nights 10pm to 6am and I never see anybody, hardly ever. I live with my brother and my mom, and even though I hate living with family, its still kind of something to be able to see another person around. But since I work nights, I never see them except the occasional free weekend (I work weekends too). I just go to work and see those people, but I really dislike those people, and to me they are so boring and old fashioned (mostly work with old people, there are probably 3 people in the whole building that are even close to my age). I have a super boring job where I sit at a computer for 8-10 hours a day typing up financial information. I have never really had a friend in my entire life, I'm a loner, and I've tried to blend in and be around other people time and time again, it don't work. I am just finding that I am having such a hard time in my life right now, I get so bored sometimes I just sleep for 12 hours a day, or stare at a wall. But I have to be careful cause if I let my mind wander for too long I'll start thinking about bad stuff like suicide. I've been sad and depressed for as long as I can remember. Sometimes I say that I'd like a girlfriend, but then I see the realization that there isn't anyone out there that would want to be with me. No one likes anybody that is all down and depressed all the time, and that's me, I'm always just a downer, a drag-along person. I hate my life, I tried to be somebody I'm not, but in the end I can't, I just can't seem to get out of this endless loop of depression.

I never knew what I wanted to be my career, and I had a really hard time going through the career aptitude tests in high school and college. I told my counselor one time that I had thought of everything in the world and I honestly can't see myself doing anything. She thought I was crazy to have thought of everything and just outrule it but I still stand by that. I find absolutely no joy whatsoever in my life. The job I have now I feel is the most I can ever do, if not more than what I can do, I'm just seeing how long I can keep it before I get fired. I swear I don't even comply or if I do I barely comply with what they want me to do, and somehow they still think I'm good at it. I hate that place and everything is so pointless to me. I really don't like money at all, I just use it to stay alive but I'm staying alive for a reason unknown to me, some sort of survival instinct although I lost the will to live long, long ago.

My brother and I play lots of video games, I was hooked on games before I could even talk. Yes, video games are basically my drug, without games, I don't see myself being alive today. But I've gotten bored of even video games, I've pretty much played every game in existence.

When I think about doing other things, I get so turned off and just want to go to sleep. I think about traveling, and how everybody around me is saying "oh its so great, you get to see new places, meet people, and do all this stuff..." but to me, it is way more hassle than it is worth. I don't want to worry about packing luggage and all this crap I have to bring and how I'm going to buy tickets and get places on time and all this. These are the things that I hate in life.

Everything is just turning into a black and white tv show. Boring neighborhood I don't even see anyone outside ever, no one talks to anybody, nothing is going on. There couldn't be more things I hate about this life. I am just wondering if anyone feels anything similar.