I started cutting when I was about 12, stopped for a while (but still did other self destructive things like drugs and alcohol)... then cutting again for a while when I was about 15 or 16, I would cut myself on my legs where no one could see them.. When I was 17 I finished rehab and went to Outpatient care and I got a lot better, aside from occasionally smoking, I quit the hard drugs and the heavy drinking and the cutting and things got alot better in my life.. or so I thought.

I have tiny almost invisible scars from when I used to cut, nothing I was ever self conscience of.

Recently, I had an emotional and mental breakdown, I grabbed a pair of scissors and carved a LONG, DEEP cut on my wrist. I wasn't trying to kill myself, I was just in alot of pain at the time, and I still am.

Now I have this huge UGLY scar and I'm embarrassed.

At times I feel like doing it again from being so overwhelmed with pain and emotions, but I don't really WANT to do it. I have to myself over and over again not to do it.

The rehab was for the drug use, I have never sought help for my problem with cutting. I thought I was past that until recently.