What I find interesting and true about what Open Eyes said is how we are "trained" to go for certain kinds of people...since Sadness2011 married one man who had been friends with the hurtful ex, i think that illustrates Open Eyes comment perfectly...the two hurtful men in her life used to be friends...of course they were friends, they have something in common...not knowing how to treat women! I just thought it was something to ponder. I hope you get to feeling better Sadness, I have been there too.