Just a quick thank you to PC and members for helping me get through the hardest time of my life. Even though, really the healing has only just begun.

I am 1.3 ish year now of no cutting (wow even I am impressed.) I did all sorts of thing when cutting to stop, even by cutting 'more'. Strange. I recognise cutting as part of the psych of some kind of addiction; what kind of psych addiction? Well I am still working that one out, but I have a better idea now of the roots

Coming off my medications has helped loads. Nothing has changed. I am still the same peep. Its almost like swimming to the bottom of the lake, to find what I was looking for in the first place. Something in life that was/is missing.

Confidence is better. The scars remain though. I will have some clever cover ups done to try to hide the scars. The scars are on my left arm and very noticeable to any eye. Esp now its summer. I dont try to cover them up. But sometimes I wish I could make them vanish. Alas no. I must live with the scars, and even after I have some kinda of cover up done I will always notice the scar tissue. Maybe I wont have them covered up because I had a cover up done before and then I went and cut again. Maybe because I thought it was because I could get away with it or because I feel for some reason the need to feel 'imperfect' till I find the bottom of the lake. And find whats missing.

Anyhow, thank you all. I hope that anyone reading this will find some kind of recognition I what I am saying. If not, I am sure I will write something along this note again. I do think that part of the start of 'my' own healing process was giving support to other people who need support. Like you gave to me..xxxxxxxxx