I'm sorry. I do relate ..... I was in the hosp. 4x last summer, the last my H called the cops and they took me there in handcuffs. These are not pleasant memories for me either ...... they come up, but I try not to dwell on them. I can't change the past or the facts of what all happened, but I can focus on what's happening now, that I'm better, that I'm cared for, have compassion on myself/others that were involved then and not let myself be caught up in the hurt so much again ...... you can acknowledge that there is still hurt there, that's OK, just be careful about feeding it too much ....