Sorry about the weird title but that's what's been on my mind all evening. Saw t today and we had a really good session, I had done a lot of work since last time and had a lot of stuff written down to talk about. One of the things was a dream I had part of which, I dreamed that my husband bought a new car and I was really mad at him because I didn't want any new debt and I told him to take it back and get out of it and he refused. There were like 3 other scenes in it too like a road to my parent's house disappearing and discovering a cave or something underneath a yard, all kinds of weird stuff, but when we put it all together and were translating the dream symbolism my t came up with this: we don't know what it is yet, but there's going to be a price I have to pay.... I didn't really absorb what she'd said at first, it hit me later, but I have this feeling that she's right about that. I don't know, and excuse the rambling, but I think maybe because of the changes that are happening inside me during this process? or is it because of things that I am learning about myself? She's lucky she didn't give me email access to her cuz she'd have received one tonite with a ton of question marks in it. I'm just really really wondering now what she meant by that. I think perhaps - it might relate to my FOO I live pretty far away from them so don't see any of them but a couple times a year if that. So they aren't experiencing the changes in me as they come they're gonna get 'em in one big ol' lump. I don't know. Thinking with my fingers here I guess. I guess I already know what I want to talk about next time. The price, and what if I decide it's not worth it? At the moment, as I am typing this, I feel like it's worth it no matter the cost because I KNOW I am healing and growing, and becoming the me I was meant to be all along. But wow. What could she mean?

Thanks for putting up with my rambling!!