Wow Nightsky.... it sounds like you tried everything that you could.... maybe it is time to move on...

But just a thought like devil's advocate here... do you think that you have spent so much time trying to "process this issue" (and this might be totally off the wall since I have no idea what happened) that you haven't let yourself see how the relationship could be different... Like maybe you have been trying to get the relationship back to where it was but it won't ever be that again. Well you will never get "this" relationship with another T either.. because a relationship is between 2 people and their personalities is what makes it unique... So no matter whether you stay with your T or not you will not have the past relationship with your T...but you could have a new one...

Just a thought...

but your healing is a journey and like life where we have many people who impact us over our lifetime...like a favorite school teacher or professor... that we will always remember fondly and with a special spot in our heart...and with a knowledge that if we live life in an open way there will be other wonderful people entering our lives in the next stage...

Wishing you a wonderful vacation and a real peace about your decision.