******TRIGGER!!!*******
I've felt similarly before. When I was in high school, there was a boy a few years younger than me who I saw in the hallways but did not know who killed himself. Although I think it's perfectly appropriate to be sad, it was very bizarre to witness the range of reactions that people had to the boy's death. It was well known after the suicide that he had been mercilessly teased. I can say that my personal reaction was to feel regretful that I could not have protected him... I didn't even know his name before he died and certainly didn't know or witness that he was being teased. Other students responded by expressing that he deserved to be made fun of and they were glad he was gone (I think a reaction to actual guilt, internally). Most responded by putting the boy on a pedestal and pledging never to forget him. I find this noble, but why not help someone while they are alive?!?