(((Spirit))) I read it and didn't cross or roll my eyes at all. I have really distanced myself from good healthy friendships. People say that I am a good friend, and I'm sure they believe it. I send the occasional card, and practice random acts of kindness. But there is always a wall, and I think people pick up on it eventually. I get really open with them, then retract quickly. I feel like I am too much to handle, with all my psych stuff. And I refuse to ask for support when I need it, so there is no give and take. I have two women I consider close friends, and neither knows the battle raging in my mind. I get hospitalized and disappear for a few weeks without telling them where or why. I had a very close brush with death a few mos. back and no one outside of immediate family knows. H and kids know better then to tell and have become good at making excuses for me. Last year I was halfway thru Chemo when my closest friend just stopped by. She was furious I didn't tell her.