[QUOTE=Perna;2373805]
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I would make yourself more useful at your mom's and offer to go/help with the grocery shopping and food prep (learn to cook simple meals); do the dishes after meals and practice being reliable, showing up and being there, chatting with your mom, keeping your room neat/clean and your laundry done (and the household's, there's beds to change and sheets, towels and dish towels to wash) and the bathroom picked up, etc. You do not have to act like a burden and if you don't act like a burden, you won't feel like one?
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I do the dishes and have done cleaning and such, I have also helped with cooking and such, thing is I am not there a lot. Also her boyfriend is there most of the day because he works from his computer, so she does have his help. And the issue is the psychological issues I have kind of limit how much chatting I can deal with not very good at faking I'm fine when I'm not and me and my mom argue if I am ever open there is something wrong and try to explain to her what it is...also just keeping my room clean enough, and my laundry is hard enough let alone trying to do everyones. But yeah I wouldn't say i really act like a burden when I am there...I just feel like one because I don't have any income to contribute or anything like that. Not to mention the only real reason that is still my current address is because I have nowhere else to move right now. But yeah her and her boyfriend argue a lot, and its always loud and chaotic around there which really tends to set my PTSD off...so hanging around there more is probably not a very good idea.
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Maybe make yourself a schedule and don't hang at your friend's so much? Your friend and/or his mom may not be so keen on that and/or if you are there, your friend may not be working on some things s/he should be to care adequately for him/herself? If you are out and about, shopping and learning to do stuff to run a household, it's more likely you might meet someone or see jobs available that might interest you. Notice which of your mom's neighbors are older and see if you can't do chores for them for a few bucks here and there if they want to pay you; it's good practice talking to people and becoming more comfortable around all sorts. You could start a small dog sitting/walking service or house watching for when people go on vacation, etc. Make a little brochure and go door-to-door in a block area/apartment building and introduce yourself and just be friendly and chat with people if they want.
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Well where do you suggest I spend my time then, I mean my moms house stresses me out and causes me to have more panic attacks? Also I am 22 and he's 40 something and does not live with his mom so we're both adults. He's actually been in military combat and is on disability ...but for whatever reason we enjoy each others company...too much age difference for me to be interested in a relationship. But yeah so anything he is obligated to do he does, I don't get in the way of that...but he is to physically well and kinda mentally screwed up to work. Also I don't want to sound pathetic...but things have gotten to the point with me where i really have to be careful about going to grocery stores...I get far too anxious if I am in one too long or if I am even out in public too long. And honestly I feel I can barely take care of myself because of the sometimes disabling anxiety or depression, so I am not sure about trying to run a whole household. Also to be honest I am not sure I could knock on doors asking for work, its really difficult and sometimes impossible for me to talk to people I don't know especially when I am the akward one knocking on there door. Also after the negative experiances I keep having with people, like what I described happened when I tried going to a job interview just feeds my general paranoia about people having bad intentions, and I am not very good at defending myself against ridicule or rudeness or bullying type behavior so yeah I kind of feel intimidated by people in general not that i want to but it's how I feel...I know I probably sound pathetic, not trying to be difficult...I mean its frusterating to me to that I am so limited by stupid anxiety, ptsd and depression symptoms.
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When you don't have to go to a set job, that's the time to look around and try a whole bunch of things. Volunteer for several places; think about delivering pizza or business-to-business packages or starting an errand running service. Find an old yellow pages phone book and leaf through it looking at all the jobs and see if any ideas jump out at you. See if you can get a janitorial/cleaning/helper types of jobs for small businesses. Insurance agents and Realtors all work for themselves, find "tiny" businesses like that who have offices and see if you can figure out how to get a little money from several. Go "underground" until you can figure out what you'd like to do, save some of what little you make so you'll have a little savings in a year or two to make a start once you get a "real" job you like.
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I am actually thinking of applying for SSI, since my disorders interfere with my ability to function. I mean unless i can find a job that can accommodate that, or somewhat reach a better mental state...then there is not much chance of getting a job I mean as I said I just can't live up to their standards, I'm too slow and I come off as too much of as too mental like the one employer said. Also I don't drive....applied for a cleaning sort of position but that is the one that I didn't get because I think I screwed it up by being thrown off guard with the question of how I drank, also then a couple days later I had this terrible PTSD freak out, panic attack thing and to be honest I've felt noticeably worse since that so I kinda didn't really try and check the status on the job or really bother trying to get it after that. Anyways that is all very good advice...It just I don't know doesn't quite fit my situation. I mean not to mention it would be nice if I got along better with my mom and her boyfriend but with them constantly arguing I have to kind of stay away unless i want to go off on them