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thanks so much for the comments and support. this definitely was an experience to learn from.
i do have an update: my therapist must has worked something out because she contacted me - we will have our session. i am so thankful.
__________________
Happiness cannot be found
through great effort and willpower,
but is already present,
in open relaxation and letting go.
Don't strain yourself,
there is nothing to do or undo.
Whatever momentarily arises
in the body-mind
Has no real importance at all,
has little reality whatsoever.
Don't believe in the reality
of good and bad experiences;
they are today's ephemeral weather,
like rainbows in the sky.
~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~
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