I'm sorry, Lex. I'm sorry you didn't get more. More of your mom.

You know she knows about all of your actions, since she died. All of your warm thoughts. She is right there, with you, in your grief.

Anniversaries are a *****. No doubt. Even if you try to ignore the calendar, you can't. The changing seasons. The length of the day. You can't hide from the calendar.

One trick I learned, around anniversaries..... I call it "puttin' out the cushions". You do know it's coming, so you prepare. You make cozy places in your life, to snuggle into when you need them. You know you're going to need them, so you prepare them ahead of time. So you're ready. So that, when the anniversary comes, and you don't really feel up to setting up a snuggly place, it's already there. Customized, for just that occasion. Customized by you, for you. Self love.

I'm sorry for your loss. She will teach you, for the rest of your life. You can live on, in her stead.

Blessings,
Lar