Wow this is exactly why/how I found this forum. I feel like I am tired of talking about the same old stuff over and over, and don't want to have my current safety net get tired of me. Also I hear that I am the only one that can keep me safe, but I often feel really close to. It staying safe. I call the hotline. But I kind of feel weird doing it. I dont feel sad I have friEnds I enjoy lots of things. I just have repeated suicidal thoughts and am at a loss as to how to cope with it. Sometimes I just need some place to chat until I can fall asleep and sometimes that takes hours. I get so tired distracting myself.