After two weeks of mania I came crashing down into a deep depression. I pulled out my list of coping skills my T and I created. The depression happened so fast and was so severe my coping skills had no impact. I writhed on the floor in agony. I couldn't leave the house. Thoughts of self harm and annihilation flooded my mind. I tried to meditate and practice self care. I was terrified of ending up in the psych ward again. I decided to try writing. As I writhed on the floor I grabbed a pen and a notebook. Pen nailed to page I scribbled for hours. I did this for days as I struggled with the torment. I have to admit my writing had a morbid quality with topics of death and decay but it successfully helped me get a grip on my destructive thoughts of self harm. I controlled my impulses and after a week I pulled out of the depths of the depression.