Women have a tendency to blame themselves when a spouse cheats. I'm not saying a woman (or a man) can't do things to drive her (or his) spouse away, but the blame is on the man (or woman) for not communicating. Some people have difficulty doing so, but when you get married, you're supposed to have developed this ability. You aren't responsible for your husband's cheating; he made that choice, rather than tell you what he was dealing with or felt he wasn't getting that he needed. You're not a mind reader.

In any case, I wish you luck in dealing with this.