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Nammu · May 31, 2012 at 08:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rose Panachée

I've been trying to answer this question all day.

And still. I have nothing.

No words of wisdom. No enlightened, elegant prose. Nothing brilliant to share.

The parts of me that were taken can never be recovered. The monsters that have committed violence against me walk unscathed. The abusers continue to abuse (with or without me there).

The best I can do to heal is to get as far away from them as possible.

And THEN gingerly examine every single little detail of every single painful, agonizing thing from my life.

Hopefully, it will be then, my heart will repair, and I will learn to trust again. To live my own life.

And never look back. And justice will be just another very benign word in the dictionary.

This is how I feel, I can not find the words. No words, no knowledge of this, especially sense there were multiple abusers.

The first was dead when I began to remember.
My ex was also diagnosed as a sociopath-by one pdoc and antisocial by another, but I think it is the same thing. I found out at the divorce hearing-the judge had sent him to be tested and I was given full custody that was to me a big bright flame of justice at the time, unfortunately back then they didn't do much about enforcing OP's orders of protections. While we sat in a safe house the police called and asked for me to come pick him p because they couldn't handle him! He really knew how to play the system.
Later was the worse, a pdoc in a locked hospital. I can't find justice anywhere for that one because too many knew of the abuse but said nothing for fear of their d^$m jobs. Their jobs!!! Doesn't compare. This still keeps me from fully trusting any pdoc now. I only got out because I excaped, my lawyer told me to run, to tell him I was safe but not where I was. Homeless, while the pdoc lived in his big house. Great question---what is justice?