i feel empty no i am empty of emotions. i wonder will my life just go on like this and i'll die not knowing what it feels like to be in love for good..
i had an arranged marriage i've dated several guys before that and with each one thought that yes this is true love but finally things would turn out wrong.
i accepted my husband becoz at that time my ex (who was my bf at that time) we had a fight and were not talking. wen my husband came with his propsal i accepted and in the family where i am i had to go ahead with that.
my bf cried a lot asked me to come back but i was commited and didnt. we still in contact and we miss each other. but with time that pain eased as i knew i made the wrong choice but i had commitments.
now i recently came to knw my husband cheated on me and me even if i was tempted to do that with my ex i stayed loyal to my marriage. now i come to think why i didnt do it..
i broken to pieces i have a little daughter (it was during my pregnacy that i got hints about his infidelity) for whom i have to live and keep smiling but thats not MY life. i want to be in love again and enjoy know all the magical things love brings and be happy..but...........i know i'll die with that wish becoz my responsibility is first.
i wanted to divorce but the effect it will have on my daughter made me bak out and my husband cried a lot saying he repents and that he loves me bla bla bla..but i don't feel anything for him apart hatred and anger..
wat an interesting life to live wer u have no motivation no feelings nothing.