Bonnie - it's heartbreaking to watch or know your child's suffering. i have an 18 yr old daughter who is really trying to get better. But my 16 yr old son just keeps doing the risky behavior and tries to refuse help. I guess it's good he's under 18 and I can legally make him get help. But I only have a year and a half until he's 18.

But Merlin is right, a therapist for yourself. My therapist and I already have the conversations about and how i can't control much of my son's behavior, and have to keep myself healthy. Easier said than done. I've become codependant and have a lot of trouble dealing with these decisions he's making.

My heart goes out to you, it must be so difficult having her so far away. I did that to my parents when I was 19, dropped out of college and ran away to another state with a boy. I feel so bad now for worrying my family. But my mom and I are very close now. Good luck to you, I hope things get better.