darla, you admit you have a problem. that is the first step of recovery. i had a hard time getting sober years ago and bounced around psych wards and dual diagnosis wards-bipolar, major depressive disorder and alcoholism. they all fed the other. a viscious cycle until i stopped drinking/ plus i had to be vigilant about my MH dx's. it worked. i am 22 years sober and rarely deal withh my MH issues and take my meds responsibly.
i went to AA regularly. that helped me treat the disease off alcoholism. i saw a T and pdoc. that combo was the key, AA, Therapy, a pdoc. i learned in AA that people, places and things affected my sobriety. i hung with the winners in AA instead. i got a sponsor and followed her suggestions even if wanted to balk. (she knew more about staying sober than i.)
your desire to change and get sober will help you stay the course. if we stray from what we've learned we will fail time and again.
please don't get discouraged. you can accomplish this and a wonderful life for you awaits. please know we care, understand and support you getting well.