I'm glad you're willing to keep at it, despite what I understand sounds corny. It would kind of irk me to have to promise not to hurt anyone else, when that is not the issue for being there.

Then, again, if there are people in the group who have expressed ideation about hurting others, shouldn't they be in a different group? It doesn't sound like it's that kind of a group. In the world, of psych, however, apples and oranges can get mixed together.

Despite what hits you as off - and I understand how it does - you might get something out of being there. A day program helped me a lot. Some stuff was off-putting, but I found it was worth tolerating that for the insight I gained. Peers there helped me a lot.

Then, again, I went to group (at a different time and place) where nasty stuff was allowed, and I did decide to leave. It was a case of peers attacking each other, with professional moderators letting it go on. That's another kettle of fish. Even regarding that, I kind of wish I had stayed and just made a calm statement about how wrong I thought those dynamics were. It might have strengthened me to stand up to it. When you get upset is when you really have a chance to learn something, by trying something new to deal with the upset.