OK, I've been struggling this past week and have not been in a good place.
My just 3 more months of no action and then we will be safe has not come.
I rcvd notification that there is a cs hearing coming up soon that I am suppossed to go to. I have decided NOT to go. Whereas my ex is simply trying to get a reduction, it is the state going after him.
I do not care about cs and know that whether I go or not it will be reduced. I do not care! Let him do the dance with the state. I have never rcvd a dime nor do I want a dime. NOR WILL HE EVER PAY A DIME FOR CS OR THE THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS THAT WERE COURT ORDERED FOR ATTORNEY FEES. My desire is freedom from him and safety for my son and I. I DO NOT CARE ABOUT THE $.
My presnce was requested to give testomy in the issue- there is nothing to testify as I haven't spoken to him for the past 1 1/2 year and wont for another 8 years due to a restraining order against him. Court issued.
This is another play on his part to try and "win" at a game that is utter nonsence.
My fear is that if it reduced (even though i know he will never pay) He will come after us for partial custody.Something he doesn't really want but as a way to hurt and continue to have control over me. It is a sick game he plays. I am strggling to be logical about this and not look to the future.
There is no DNA that he is the father and we were not married. He files motions himself then never shows up...which has cost me so much $ to protect us. There is no money left. I would request DNA in a heatbeat if I KNEW he was not the father.
I must trust that the judge will see through him and this. I cannot participate, at leaste not for cs. If custody were at question (I have sole) that would be different. That will be his next step..I FEAR..if he is given any slack. I however know it will be reduced regardless so why subject myself to this...his lies or his pity games.
Any input would be appreciated. Please understand my mental stability on this subject is delicate and my fears very real.
I can't emotionally see him and see no more point of this nonsence. What bothers me and what I am concerned about is that if I don't go they will cut my childs medicaid (I don't have private insurance for him)I was never served papers and although I have always followed the rules... but without being served any papers... I suppose this was just notification and request.?? Standard paperwork?? Regardless it has me up in arms.

I don't know! To go or not. I guess I have answered my question but would really appreciate feedback. I have made it point to cut all ties from him or mutual aquientencies and I'm afraid if I go he will "learn" more about me and pursue "other" avenues to hurt me. I would rather stay invisible.

Please if you can, provide some insight I could be over looking.

Thank you