Thank you so much- for your whole post but especially for this part. My experience is the same- that T is parenting me and I am letting go of the hope that I will be parented. I had wondered whether I had got this wrong- had somehow misunderstood my own experience- so it is good to hear I'm not alone.

My T says either 'I feel a lot of love for you' or 'I feel very loving towards you'. Very occasionally I used to push for the exact three words. But I know I have the three words, just in a way which feels ok for her. I don't need to push anymore- I just know.