I'm a little confused now...

But I think I think something like this... even if I'm an adult I feel more like someone's kid than anything. I don't have any kids so I sort of feel with the kid. I really don't understand your needs as a parent, I will admit to that. I didn't mean to sound accusatory, it just felt scary knowing she well go back to her old environment.

You say there are no Asperger groups, does that mean no autism groups as well? I assume so, or they could maybe help.

I'm not a fan (at all), of Autismspeaks, but they have some people really knowing ALL the laws and regulations which could come in handy.

Also... when someone says something dumb online, sometimes people misunderstand or just blurt something out. I know it does feel like bad treatment in the past, but those here are your peers, no more no less. They have no real influence over your life, they are not in power of everything. I know it is hard to just ignore some stuff people say, but try, if it is of no help.

Your situation is sort of way too complex to try to give any straight advice, but I hope things will work out for you and your daughter finally.