My brother got hit by a car and died 19 years ago. He was 13 and I was 16. My mother and father were divorced and we lived with my father. My mother has blamed me for his death ever since. It wasn't my fault, I was at school when he got hit by the car. She would call me every day and ask me if he came home yet or where he was. I had separation anxiety from my brother from the time he was born, I don't know why. We were together most all of the time until we started school.

When I got married the emotional abuse from my mother and then my husband continued. I left him!! But still had her in my life trying to run and ruin it all at the same time.

6 years ago I met the most wonderful understanding man in the world. We are engaged. I have since we met had horrible separation anxiety from him. Recently my mother started triggering me again. And when it would happen I would take it out on my fiance'. Yelling, screaming, throwing things, threatening to kill myself. I remember none of this, but he now has the emotional scars.

I just started therapy last week and am starting to get better. I've cut all ties with my mother to the point of having the local PD call her and tell her if she didn't leave me alone the DA would press charges.

My therapist wants me on meds and I've been on so many in the last 19 years and my body really doesn't do well on them. I seem to do better when taking herbal supplements.

I still have a hard time finding positive in things or thinking anything I do is good enough. Does anyone have any tips?

I hate it when I'm told to get over it, just move on with your life.

Thanks for listening and just being here.