It's understandable, you are not alone in this. I think this happens to a lot of people. A lot of the time we blame ourselves when things don't go right. I sometimes feel the way you do, blaming myself for everything that goes wrong. Try not to be too hard on yourself. When you feel it coming on try to do the things that help you calm down. We think more clearly when we are calm. Maybe try to get your space as well when you start feeling uneasy and talk about things when you have had time to collect yourself before they blow up.