That's what a marriage counselor is for is getting everything out into the open.....all sides so that each can have a better understanding of the other.

Wow, I'm impressed that you are realize you haven't heard a word that's been said for years & you are really working at listening. My husband would listen, but he would only hear & interpret what I said to be what he wanted to hear & it wasn't anything close to what I had said. Really glad to hear that you are working on this & truly are taking it seriously.

This is such an important part of working through your problems....being able to have a neutral party there where both can talk through what each thinks the problems are & who can moderate what is said so that there isn't the fighting & you can truly get to see each other's point of view. It's the only way to truly make a marriage work. So glad you have found a good marriage counselor. My psychologist was very poor at marriage counseling but my husband also refused to make any changes necessary to make the marriage work.....so I am so glad to hear that you are open to the changes you are able to make. I am sure there are changes your wife needs to work on also. Sounds like there is definitely a positive outlook that each want to work on the marriage & the desire is there to make it work.

Thanks for keeping us updated......haven't had time to post lately. More work to taking care of a farm than one person can easily handle.

I fixed my lawn tractor, but the grass had grown so long in the fields that my poor little lawn tractor couldn't handle it. Ended up loosening the blades & then broke sending pieces of the blade flying across the yard. Luckily, none of my dogs got in the way of the flying metal (I thought there were just rocks that had gotten in the blades didn't realize the blades had actually come loose). Luckily hired a neighbor to bush hog the fields. Have to replace the blades on my mower so I can get back to the mowing this week before the grass starts growing too tall again.....have about 2 1/2 acres to keep mowed. Weeds had overgrown everything while I was trying to get the inside of the house worked on. Have trash to haul to the dump & recyclling to get there also.......then I look out on my back deck today & something knocked over all the railing. Not sure if his bush hog caught one of the posts that was supporting it or what.

Have to seriously get busy around here.....really no time to even goof off a little & I really don't have enough energy to keep up with all the work that I need to do & don't have the money to really pay to have it constantly done.....so I HAVE to do the work myself now that they got it to the point where I can do it myself.

Sadly, it wouldn't have done me any good to stay with my husband because he wouldn't do the work anyway or be any help.....sad when I'm better off by myself & I have a rough time keeping up the energy to be able to do it all.

It's really so good to hear that there is really a guy out there that is willing to work on your marriage & care enough to listen & hear what is needed to make the relationship & the family work. Sounds like you are doing a very good job at working through this....just make sure to let your side of things be heard also......changes aren't just one sided in making a marriage work.

Bug's creep into marriages until there is a whole swarm of them & it takes time to work through everything that has creeped into the marriage relationship.