@hankster had to wait to reply to this one 'cause I had to think.

Funny, "papa bear" is my nickname for my fiancé. I would never think of Backup T as a papa bear. My papa bear probably outweighs him by 100 pounds! lol

and whaddya mean now you see why the Dom??? :-P

Thanks for the book recommendation! I will almost certainly read it. I like philosophical. I was telling my fiancé a story from my childhood yesterday and he said, wow, that sounds like extreme emotional neglect. (what, most parents don't just open the car door and let their 4 year old out on the street in front of the day care center and drive off not realizing that the day care center is closed because of Memorial Day??? LOL)

I never thought of my childhood as "unhappy". In fact I'm grateful that my parents weren't more involved in my life because I would've turned out completely differently. I think I walk this very, very fine line when describing my childhood to people. If I decide to do this work with some therapist it's gonna be really important to me that we NOT slip into portraying my childhood as "bad" or "emotionally abusive". It wasn't. I was very happy being alone most of my time with my dog and my books. Turned me into the lovable super-nerd I am today! lol

And yes these forums are the best support group I could ask for. I'm so grateful to have found such genuinely caring people who are struggling just as much and often more so than I am. I love y'all so much!!