So, my mini-mania which is as close as I get 2 happiness- because my baseline emotion is depression...kind of like a low grade fever you just can't get rid of. Despite years of therapy and almost every med and combination of meds, the depression always lingers. So when the mania starts I don't mind a bit. Unfortunately it's getting worse and I know I'll end up completely bonkers- and not have a shred of awareness until I've been in the hospital for days. I called my dr for an appt and of course he is booked solid, then goes on vacation for a week and is booked up for another week. I told the receptionis I didn't think it was a good idea for me to wait that long. The best she could do was put me @ the top of a waiting list in case someone cancels. I called back and told her...I've been dr __ patient for ten years and I'm telling u I have 2 see him within the next few days or I'm gonna end up in the hospital. She magically came up with an appt for 2day. Thank god. Haven't been sleeping, scattered and disturbing thoughts. Including cutting. Maybe we can fix this without yet another trip to the hospital. So sometimes being a pain in the rear end is a good thing!