I love reading the memoirs of others with this disorder. It has helped me see it from different perspectives. Maybe I will add my own story to the collection. I will have plenty of time on my hands. My recent manic episode completely destroyed my career plans. Iam a senior in college and I was planning on applying for a graduate program in Psychology when I graduate next year. While I was manic I decided psychology had evrything wrong. It was backwards. The world needs more madness. I decided madness was the cure for the rampant materialism in the world today. I felt like there should be a national holiday where everyone goes mad for a day. I canceled my registration for the year long clinical psychology program that would fulfill all my graduate school prerequisites and began writing my manifesto on the benefits of madness. I imagined designing workshops that would induce madness and teaching them in locations around the nation. I would create a big retreat center where people could safely explore madness for a week and enrich their lives. I thought madness held within it spiritual insights that could be gained no their way. I sincerely believed everyone needed to go stark, raving mad at least once in their lifetime. I quit doing my school work and headed downtown to consult with the experts. I found an old man talking to a tree. He agreed to assist me in my research. I found another man wrapped in a big green blanket. He was talking to Jesus. He also agreed to help me. The third man I found talking to an invisible friend refused to help me unless I agreed to be his shadow. Strangely I found students willing to be my test subjects. Two weeks later I came crashing down. Now the only classes open for registration are poetry, dancing, and consciousness studies. There is no chance I will fill my prerequisites for graduate school. It is difficult to accept things like this. I have to accept the fact that I must walk a completely different path. I have no idea where I am going. It is always an adventure. I hope with humor and compassion I can learn to navigate my way through the dark