The college I attend is an alternative school. The program in Psychology is a year long designed for interdisciplinary study, covering the history of psychology, statistics, clinical research, and an internship. The program is full and the waitlist is full. I would have to stay in school for an additional year if I want to complete my prerequisites. Given my lack of judgement during this recent episode and the frequency of my episodes I am questioning my plans to become a therapist. I am thinking of writing and doing research instead. I love doing research. My pdoc and T say this is about as stable as I am going to get. I have to work on accepting the severity of my condition and working with it. They are trying to help me create realistic goals. I feel kind of dismal in the wake of this recent disaster. I can't quite accept the fact that this is what I have to live with.