Quote:
Originally Posted by LydiaB
It was so weird. It was just a matter of a missed diagnosis. Nobody caught on that I was DID and as soon as they did and they started treating it I started turning into a human. People always said things like I just wasn't trying hard enough, I wasn't "working the program". But I am one of the hardest workers out there and I give myself credit for that. I never gave up on the stupid mental health system that told me I had schizophrenia. I just kept looking for answers. I knew I didn't have schizophrenia.
I just kept telling myself "you got over an entire eating disorder with minimal help, this is not a lack of effort on your part."
I would spend long, long hours just looking for answers. Lyme disease, seizures, narcolepsy, their was something they were missing. Since I got the diagnosis, I no longer do that. I feel a little more "whole". Which is ironic.
I just feel like somebody finally actually sees that part of me, and I know that my old therapist saw that part of me, but it was different with him, I didn't believe him. I thought he was just saying that. Because I had so many other people at the same time telling me differently. And his colleagues treated me like I was a freak of nature.
I don't know why I would believe people who barely even know me.
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Wow. This is one of the most touching posts I have read on PC. You are a success story and a hard worker.
I am happy that you did not end up in some state psychiatric hospital.
Did you discover you had DID on your own?
I went through a similar ordeal. The doctors had no clue what my problem was. Many different diagnoses were given, but none of them fit. (Psychotic Disorder NOS, schizophrenia, psychotic depression, bipolar II, cyclothymia, dysthymia, anxiety disorder, and borderline personality disorder) It was very frustrating, because I knew, I did not have any of these disorders, except for the dysthymia and anxiety. I read all I could and even questioned everything about me. My extensive research confirmed that I was right. It kept me going. I knew someday, I would find "the answer."
Once, I received the correct diagnosis, Asperger Syndrome, everything changed. It was the first label that fit me 100% and it explained all my life long challenges, and feelings. (So many doctors back then thought I was autistic but were blinded by the the need to explain my problems with an Axis 1 disorder.) Suddenly, people started listening to me and looking at me differently. I was no longer considered lazy, unmotivated and so forth. It has been the greatest relief I have ever felt.
This experience has taught me to never let anyone tell me who I am and to question everything.
Patients/clients do know a lot. Doctors need to listen to what we are really saying. We know ourselves best.