Radio, if I may please, take these two sentences from your post and tell you how I feel now...

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But there will always be this sense in the back of our minds, that we have been violated. ... And then some know of the damage, but they have sewn a patch on the damaged parts and continued forward.. The damage will always be there.

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The fact that I was sexually abused is NOT always in the back of my head. It only comes to the fore during discussions like this one or on a one on one.

I don't feel damaged in any way. The blame for those actions falls squarely on my grandmother's shoulders... and on my dad's.

The fact that I was a promiscuous teenager, I take that responsibility because I knew better! My mom had drummed it into my head that it's wrong to have sex before marriage. I, personally, discarded that. I have forgiven myself because now I understand that I was looking for a connection with someone else. I didn't have it at home nor did I have a friend that I had that connection with. I was also looking for someone to "take care of me" emotionally.

As for putting a patch over the damaged area, to me it's more like a broken bone. When you break a bone, more bone grows over the break making that part stronger. That's how I view the hurt part of me. It's stronger now. *I* am stronger now.

Like Maya Angelou says "Wouldn't Take Nothin' For My Journey Now"!