I understand where your coming from.... k.... But I think each person "healing" and/or "gets it", is as individual as we are all unique.. I can't say as you have, that I have not been damaged.. I am damaged.. My problem through out all of this "supposed healing" process was very confusing to me...And just today I realized that I am not just damaged goods..... There is a lot more to me than just what has been damaged.. I can also understand that what is damaged can be mended... Maybe I patched things over, but also seeing that I've become one covered with many patches and nothing was left, but patches....Either patched or discarded,I was living a defeated life........My "getting it" today to me means I can look under the patches, clean up the wounds, mend and go forward with hope... not with the self defeating attitude that I've had for a long time..There may be scars, but they won't be infected, seeping with loath and self hate and defeat......... You had strength where I didn't... I am a lil old to discover "inner strength", but I am glad I did.......Better now than never ...