I really am not doing well. I'm just consistently screwing everything up. The up and down of emotion is turning to just down, down, down lately. Pot would really make me feel better. Just to get giggly & be happy, listen to/feel/experience music, eat food that tastes 20 times better, and sit there doing nothing and then pass out comfortably. I doubt I can get any right now though, and I doubt that will help me get hired at a bank -_- in the hopefully near future. Which makes me feel even better, because I can't have what I want and what I know will just make me feel better.

Everyone hates me, the list just keeps growing. In the end I'm going to be completely alone, instead of the mostly alone state I am in now. Woooo.