Thanks everyone, for your support. Well, the doctors couldn't do a biopsy of the mass because it's just too big and bleeds too easily. Mom's scheduled for outpatient surgery on Tuesday so the gyn can perform a hysteroscopy and D&C to determine if it's invasive. The doc says that she'll probably be able to go home after the procedure, but to pack a bag just in case. It's a 2 hour drive to the hospital, but I'm going to stay with her. I'm so worried for her--I just want her to be okay.

I'm so bloody stressed right now. One of my kittens has been fighting a highly contagious form of feline rhinotraceitis for over two weeks now, and she's so little. Her mother abandoned her at 3 weeks, so I've been bottle-feeding her myself, trying to get her well. The vet prescribed some meds for the illness, but they didn't do squat. Last Friday, I awoke to find that both of her eyes had ruptured because of the infection and one had popped out entirely. I screeched and rushed her to the vet hospital, and the vet told me that both of her eyes must be removed. So, I'm supposed to pick her up later today--if she survives the surgery. It has a 25% fatality rate for kittens her age, and she's also been sick, so...

I just can't take it. This couldn't have come at a worse time. I don't have they money to pay the vet bill, so I'm either going to have to take out a loan or argue out a payment option at the vets (and they're really *****y about being paid immediately--I've been a very good client thus far, but I still expect a fight). The emotional & financial toll is incredible. I feel like I'm being torn apart at the seams. Plus, tomorrow I have to go with my mom to the hospital--who will be there to give my kitten her medicine? Pets aren't allowed in the hospital. The only person who could do it is my grandmother--but she can't see well and is so forgetful, I'm afraid to let her feed & medicate my baby. It's so nuts. I wish I could just hide.

I'm gonna have to figure something out, and soon. I've been looking at the sites you all mentioned and I can't say how incredibly grateful I am for all the support. You guys are the best!

I'll keep everyone posted on Mom's progress--and please, keeps those prayers coming.

Big hugs to all,

Alexiel